October 23, 2010

A Test


All week I have felt like everything I know and feel has been tested.  My patience.  My sanity.  My faith.

I have been a screaming mess of a mother all week, I am sad to report.  Each little whine.  Every dropped crumb.  It has been enough to almost push me to my brink.   I feel horrible.  I know that every mother goes through periods like this, but the way I am feeling is really eating at me.  My patience...tested.

On Wednesday night Aaron dropped a bomb on me.  To most couples this would probably not even be a second thought.  For us, it was a bomb.   I was angry that he would expect of me what he was but even more hurt that he would suggest it.  He reassured me everything would be fine and it is.  My sanity...tested. 

Tonight, I sit here knowing in my heart that everything is fine.  Hoping that my head will soon catch up.  Wishing I could just put everything I think I know and feel in His hands and let go.  My faith...tested.

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